Stumbling out of the bowels

of the earth at 3:40 am weighed

down by what parts of my life

I could carry I dropped

my last cigarette.

Bloody Hell!

This is great.

It still fascinates me how this

whole life thing works.

How moments- seconds-

the time it takes to nuke leftovers

can completely uproot an entire existence.

Then as I lurched down the street

I heard someone’s alarm go off.

It’s Sunday morning and someone’s

life was just beginning again as it

did yesterday just as mine was

about to end.

ONLY A MOMENT OF YOUR TIME

There’s a funny thing about loneliness.
It’s so ever present that sometimes
you know you’re going to be consumed
by it.
It doesn’t matter who’s around
or how gay you appear to be,
it’s there lurking in your heart.
Stalking you.
Waiting for a moment when you
feel genuine joy,
loneliness pounces upon it
leaving behind only despair,
desperation and
frustration.
Constantly trying-
sincerely trying to be happy,
but it is always just out
of your reach
like an elusive lover.
Until finally one day
you forfeit your quest for joy.
You just surrender.
And at that moment you realize
what loneliness really wanted.
It just wanted you to sit with it
for a while.
To enjoy its’ company.
And once you stop fighting against it
you see it’s not so bad after all.
It just has a bad rep.
And it’s there,
in your epiphany that your elusive lover
happiness
finally falls under your spell and
you consummate your relationship.
Yet in your blissful state you forget
how you got there.
And there loneliness is…
alone again.