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Open Letter to Michael Jackson

Dear Michael Jackson,
I’ve been needing talk to you for a long time… this is really difficult. Well, part of it is that I love you so and I don’t know what to do to help you. But I’ve got to tell you. YOU NEED HELP. Living in Dubai isn’t going to solve your problems, particularly if you don’t speak or read Arabic or understand the customs. (Although I’m sure it’s beautiful and will come visit you anytime.) You once told me you were going back to Indiana. I think that would be best.
Or, Maybe you should talk to Oprah. I’m sure she’ll talk to you. You can move into one of her complexes. She’ll call Lil’ Richard, Maya Angelou, Toni Morrison, and Dr. Phil. You guys will talk it out, eat some ribs or something. Work out whatever is making you CRAZIER THAN HELL. Excuse me. But I’m so frustrated right now because your behavior is affecting me adversely. I need to hear your voice. You have such a beautiful voice and it’s at the peak of it’s maturity. Just when I want to give up on you, you give me “Butterfly”. It’s beautiful. Your voice is beautiful.
Please stop being crazy. Let the bass come out in your speaking voice. Stop having slumber parties with little boys. Stop wearing sheila’s in Arab countries and going to ladies rooms. STOP BEING SO CRAZY.
We’ll discuss it more when we talk.


Arabian fright: Ladies’
rest room hi-Jacko’d


Jacko’s blushing – and this time it’s not just his rouge.
The Queen, er, King of Pop, disguised in an Arabic woman’s head scarf, got caught fixing his face in a ladies’ bathroom in a Dubai shopping mall Saturday.
Cops were called to the scene to resolve a dispute between Jackson, 47, and a shocked Tunisian woman who snapped his picture as he primped at the mirror. No arrests were made, according to The Khaleej Times.
Maybe the wigged-one couldn’t read the Arabic word for “women” on the rest room door, or maybe he chose the ladies’ lounge rather than risk powdering his cheeks in a Middle Eastern men’s room.
Dubai Police Col. Abdul Jalil Mehdi said he believed the pop star made an “innocent mistake” in using the ladies’ loo, the Times said
Mehdi did not comment on Jackson’s choice of head-wear – the traditional Emerati women’s scarf known as “Sheila.”
A 37-year-old teacher, identified as Latifa M., “screamed in shock and ran out of the ladies room” in the Ibn Battuta Mall when she realized Jackson was a man, the Times said.
But the school-marm shutterbug went back and snapped some pictures of the pop star with her cell phone camera.
Jackson chased after the woman and demanded the photos. She refused and asked for “compensation,” the Times said.
The ruckus attracted cops, who told the teacher her demand for money was illegal. The photos were “erased,” the Times said.
Jackson has been living in Bahrain as a guest of the royal family since his acquittal on child molestation charges last summer. He recently purchased a secluded $1.5 million property in the Amwaj Islands and plans to make his home there, according to reports.
In the U.S., Jackson’s official Web site, MJJSource.com, is down. His longtime friend and makeup artist Karen Faye posted a note to fans saying the site “is down because we have had no cooperation with Michael and his present team. … We were Michael’s voice, but if he doesn’t wish to speak or pay his bills for MJJSource, there is nothing we can do.”

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